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Larry Medina

Social Networking May Take Away as Much as It Gives

Written by Larry Medina
5/22/2009 42 comments
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Ask most people under 20 if they can remember not having regular access to the Internet in their homes, and they'll look at you like you have a third eye in the middle of your forehead.

It's inconceivable to some that prior to 1994 there really wasn't an Internet as we know it today. In fact, it remained sort of "buggy" until at least 1997, with many ISPs suffering regular outages of a day or more, DNS servers being compromised regularly, and less-than-stellar performance.

But here we are, a decade after buggy Internet access began, talking about social networking, and everyone knows what we mean, and many can now access it from handheld devices they carry around in their pockets. It now takes just a few simple keystrokes to gain access to directions, restaurant reviews, show times, and whatever else you may need while you're on the go.

All this has reduced face-to-face contact or verbal communications between people. Sure, you have a select group of friends you probably still speak to periodically on the phone, but I think nearly everyone will admit that this list is shrinking rapidly, and the calls are much less frequent. And don't even get me started on text messaging and tweets.

So, here's the question: How is it that, a few short years ago, we were more than satisfied with looking at the newspaper to find show times, or reading the Food Section to find out about new restaurants, or unfolding a paper depiction of routes and geological features to get directions, or picking up the phone to call someone if we wanted to find out how they were -- but now we need to get all this immediately from the Internet?

Many will suggest that life has gotten faster and that we need to multitask to get things done, but I think I was as busy then as I am now, and I still got things done!

Others will offer that before the Internet, they never got everything done, or never had time for themselves if they did; the availability of these enhanced means of gathering and rapidly accessing information have changed that.

These people would not be wrong. But at what cost has this happened?

Newspapers are eliminating print versions, reducing frequency of copies, or going under altogether. Good for the environment? Maybe; but not good for developing or enhancing reading skills; not good for those who prefer a tactile connection to today's information.

In my family. we've severely reduced the number of minutes used on our cellphone's "Family Plan" since we added the unlimited text option -- but I miss hearing my children's voices. And the home phone? Well, like many folks, we dropped long-distance service years ago, and the majority of calls we get are from businesses or telemarketers.

We communicate with friends by email, cell phone, text messaging, or on Facebook.

Is all of this acceptable, or an improvement? You must judge for yourself.

Earlier this week, I got a call from a friend I've known for over 30 years. It took me awhile to recognize his voice, and I found myself at a loss for words after reaching 140 characters.

It was great to hear from him, and I think I'll start calling him regularly again.

— Larry Medina has spent 37 years in the Records and Information Management (RIM) profession

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Amy Rogers Nazarov
Rank: Cyborg
Friday June 5, 2009 4:41:21 PM
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I have a buddy who joined Facebook under duress, precisely to get reacquainted with folks prior to his 25th HS reunion. "I'll quit FB when it's over," he said. Well, a) he had a blast at the reunion, thanks to the FB overtures he and others made, and b) he is getting ever more entangled in Facebook's many tentacles.

What do you think would be the warning signs that our online life--on a BBS, on FB, bouncing around among blogs of those we have and have not met in real life--threatens to subsume our offline life? Short of missing work because you're bleary-eyed from an all-night social networking fiesta, are there subtler things along the way that the self-aware might deem to be a danger sign?

 

 

knoxzoo
no ratings

That in-person thing was why so many of us had GT's back in the BBS days.  For those of you who weren't involved, GT's were "get togethers", where all the members were invited to meet up somewhere, usually at a member's home, a park, or restaurant, etc.  It allowed us to put faces with the names, integrate IRL (in real life) personalities with the online personas, and so much more.

One of these GT's spawned what was to become, for several years, the Every Other Saturday Night Poker Party, wherein the only rule was that there could be no games without wild cards. 

Would our BBS's have been as successful without the GT's?  Probably.  But, they'd have been nowhere near as fun.  Nor would we have had the opportunity to make life long friends like we did.

I think GT's are one of the things that miss the most about the demise of the BBS with the advancement of the Internet.  A couple of the newsgroups I used to frequent tried to pull of some GT's, but they just weren't the same.  And, with people involved being from all over the world, it's just not as easy to pull it off as it was when virtually everyone was local enough to be within the same area code, or set of area codes.

The GT's were detours chosen for the scenery.  And, as with IRL trips, sometimes the detours are the best part of the trip.

RIMMAN
Thinkernetter
Friday May 29, 2009 11:16:50 AM
no ratings

Not trying to end the thread, but it's been two days without a post, so it may be ending on it's own.

I'd like to thank everyone for their thoughtful replies and comments on this subject- it appears that it definitely touched a nerve with many people, and that was the intent.   I'm glad others see that the path taken doesn't always lead us to a better place, but it may get us there faster and we may not take as much time to enjoy the scenery. And that's okay too!

There's an often used quote from an unknown author that seems to fit here:

"A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery while on a detour"

And maybe that's how we should look at the use of these tools designed to enhance productivity, allow for quicker communicatiosn to broader audiences, or to otherwise provide access to others.  But let's not forget the warmth and comfort associated with hearing someone's voice on a one-on-one basis, either in person or on the phone.  

I have a professional colleague I had 'known' for maybe 4 years by e-mail and exchanges on a Listserv that I had never met in person or spoken to, and one day (about 15 years ago) out of the blue, I decided to call him. On a professional front, we've shared a lot of discussions in greater detail than we did previously, in part because for differing reasons neither of us could formally document the content of the subjects. Since that time, we've also grown to know a lot about each other, essentially "raising our kids together" and sharing the trials and tribulations that are our lives.

I'd encourage everyone to make that direct connection with someone you've never met, but "spoken to" many times through a keyboard.  You may find it rather enlightening.

Brian Newby
IQ Crew
Wednesday May 27, 2009 2:50:50 PM
no ratings

Necessary skills change, though.

Knowing an answer is now less important than knowing where to find it.  Typing, a class I took in high school, turned out to be the most important class I took in high school.

I think it's worth pointing out the name of this site--Internet Evolution.  Isn't that, really, what's happening?  Some things phase out; others phase in. 

I know the post was intended to provoke thought, but I do think the evolution has been, on balance, better than it has been bad.

Asad
Researcher
Tuesday May 26, 2009 9:36:41 PM
no ratings

I would agree with you on most of the points but everything you get has a price. And so is the this fast internet age, if on one side it is an informatiion superhighway then on other side it is depleting the human inteactions. Afterall we are social animals and need social interactions and in no way a computer or handheld device can help in bringing up human chracterics that are the reason of very existence of these human societies. But for many, specially in upcoming generations will argue against this.

reginask1
Rank: Cave Painter
Tuesday May 26, 2009 6:36:15 PM

I could not agree more with your ideas. I am one of those who did not have internet access most of my life. And we are missing out when we limit our human contact.

 

Jean Armstrong, Armstrong & Associates PR

modza
IQ Crew
Tuesday May 26, 2009 4:16:19 PM
no ratings

I finally got around to seeing "Doubt" -- where the Meryl Streep character is shocked -- shocked! and suspicious-- to see the priest using a ballpoint pen. Penmanship is disappearing. (I thought it was cute to practice with my fountain pen, but Streep would have been disappointed that I switched to cartridges after my older pen ruined a couple of good shirts...

Handwritten postal letters, anyone? Ballpoint, felt tip, rollerball, heck, I'll take a typed letter!

You know that phrase, "The world is going to hell in a handbasket" -- just re-read it and guess how old it must be, while remaining the popular refrain of all of us over 12. What's a handbasket?

knoxzoo
IQ Crew
Tuesday May 26, 2009 3:10:37 PM
no ratings

Flashback!

Me, sitting in front of three machines, cables and wires strung all over the place, multi-disk CD changers stacked in teetering piles, multiple monitors showing various windows of Mustang, phone bills for six telephone lines, all to feed my addiction to my BBS.

I was the SysOp and owner of Sherwood Forest BBS, back in the day.  One of the largest, and most used BBS's in the Phoenix area.  Carrier of FidoNet.  Founding member of JCCSnet.  Home of Stardock Loco, and several other games.  Host point of Little John's BBS Doors Archive, over 20,000 BBS doors available for local download, or through Internet connection.

I've still got the old BBS archived to some DVD's and a big hard drive.  Every once in a while I look at it, ponder a moment, then decide I really don't need any more hobbys.  :-)

Mr. Roques
Researcher
Tuesday May 26, 2009 1:26:55 PM
no ratings

I wonder if there was something before what we call today "old fashioned" communications and if when it changed, they thought the same thing.

But SN and other 2.0 commnuication apps have more advantages than disadvantages. While you may have less "close" communication with some people, you get to communicate with a lot more. So in a sense, it all balances out.

Mary Jander
Thinkernetter
Tuesday May 26, 2009 12:07:39 PM
no ratings

All forms of interaction outside of face to face are subject to personal projection and interpretation. For us verbal types, text can communicate as much or more than a phone call; but in my experience, I can misinterpret both. I simply can't rely on electronic communications of any kind for any meaningful personal interaction.

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