Taking a Pass on the FriendFeeding Frenzy

This reminds me of the Slow Food movement that has caught on in recent years. Rather than eating processed/fast/instant anything, some folks really make an effort to eat organic veg/locally caught fish/apples with a small carbon footprint, etc. Perhaps a Slow Tech movement is in the offing, and it will one day be *cool* to still have a landline, listen to CDs, and keep all yer social-network personae separate.

I don’t have a cubicle anymore, but as a self-employed person, I do have to make an effort to get out and mix it up with folks f2f, socially or in business settings with others in my field. (Too much alone time and my left eyelid starts twitching uncontrollably.) Just as we demonstrate to our kids why running with scissors is a poor idea and why one should cover one's mouth when one sneezes, we must try to walk the tech walk so our children can develop a healthy balance between their offline and online worlds.

For me, a stop at Facebook in the morning serves as my virtual run to the water cooler. The trick is knowing when to log off and begin actual work; some of my FB pals keep that thing running in background all durned day, which helps no one’s productivity and fosters a false sense of illusion that exchanging “comments” equates to a real, think-on-your-feet conversation. Ditto with the cell, the PDA, the tweets: as Silvia said so well, making good choices about how technology will benefit or enrich your life, not stunt you emotionally or replace actual interactions with others, is the key.

Nicole Ferraro: Philbro40, I'm very concerned about, and interested in, what all of this social media is doing to our ability to communicate face-to-face. I see evidence already that it's having an impact -- I see it in my own workplace -- and I think it can only get worse with future generations. Already it's unheard of for a lot of teens to not only communicate face-to-face... but even a phone call is too much to ask. I'm really interested in the behavioral aspect of all of this.

What I think has been forgotten while we have been given new ways of communicating is the actuality of communication. 

Where I work, it appears that Upper Management is leaning towards having well adjusted individuals who can bridge the gap between the Technical aspects of things and Customer Service.  Being a Helpdesk Coordinator, I have to communicate with people on a regular basis, and sometimes compensate for other's inability to articulate ideas to our user community in a fashion that won't make their eyes glaze over with confusion or utter boredom.

it is a great thing to be good at what one does.  Even Better to be the best there is at what you do. Our ability to focus on problems and provide solutions is a great gift.   However, a crucial part of any IT persons job should be, if it already isn't, the ability to communicate effectively.  E-mail and texting can only go so far; and those of us who use liasons to communicate the reasoning behind their efforts are missing out on a great opportunity to get feedback, which is always fuel for invention and innovation.

I haven't played/struggled with FriendFeed but from what I read, it gives you the opportunity to choose which sites you want to import information and activity from.

For some, it makes sense - Flickr, Facebook, davidhasselhoff.com, etc.

Kerry

> In 30 years from now, will everyone work by themselves in their cubby hole because they can't have true social interaction?

I don't think so, well it's within our choice. I already know quite a few people who have realized the impersonal effect of some technologies and go back. If they can afford they have no cell phone or they turn it off when they are with someone or want some privacy, the turn of their computers in their private time, they start sending hand written letters in some cases etc..... These are all people that live consciously and appreciate real connection.

So sometimes getting to the extreme of something suddenly makes us aware of what we are missing and then we balance and choose.

Silvia

kerryf,  I share your same fear.  My kid, finds it so difficult to pick the phone and call someone to thank them for a birthday gift.  They would much rather text and be done with it.  Our society for the next generation is going to stuggle with old world social skills. (Like speaking face to face, using the telephone as a tool for verbal communication).

Sylvia,

I'm starting to realize that with my kids.  Older kids are even worse.  They don't use the telephone at all, its just text messages.

Unfortunately even the phone isn't enough.  At work, when we have teleconferences people aren't 100% engaged.  They don't get the looks, and the face to face interaction.  At least on the phone you get a little bit of voice inflection.

Communications that are only via text, email, and IM you loose all of this.  It becomes impersonal and more difficult to "really communicate".

In 30 years from now, will everyone work by themselves in their cubby hole because they can't have true social interaction?

This FriendFeeding Frenzy, connecting all of these variegated sites seems a bit daunting. Friends, co-workers, aquaintences, strangers, misanthops who now blend in this social petri dish.  This seems just wreak of tenuous relationships, as they cross and intersect all the different aspects of ones life. These lines a beyond blurred at this rate they won't even exist.

Hi Nicole and everybody else on this track

You started a great discussion here and all the answers and comments are interesting. The point you raise in your last reply is a very important one.

"and I think it can only get worse with future generations. Already it's unheard of for a lot of teens to not only communicate face-to-face... but even a phone call is too much to ask."

There is a big difference of how we "elders" deal with the new technologies and how the young generation uses it. We have been raised in environments with no or minimal Internet possibilities, in my early business days we used telex for international communication, later the ultra cool fax was introduced. So we grew up with completely different habits and rules for communication than our young generation does.

Basically I believe that if I am a communicative person who has learned to connect, keep connected and share openly, I will be doing that no matter what technology I am using. My personality is what makes the difference, not the technology I am using.

Now for the younger generation it may be different. Many of our kids grow up with all these technologies and have a completely different relation to it. They know nothing else. And above that many children may grow up in an environment with minimal human interaction in an age where it would be very important, I'm talking about the age from birth to going to school. Many parents have to work and/or are caught up in life struggle, so children are home alone and instead of going out to play in the gardens and the forest, they sit in front of TV or computer games, which dulls the development of the brain in such an important age, as neurology can prove. On top of it in many cases they will be confronted with violent content. I am a lot more concerned about this development. There are great books out there such as Sue Gerhards "Why love matters - how affection shapes a babies brain". These children will make completely different use of all these new social networks, because they have different communication patterns. Some may be healthy, some may be very unhealthy.

The Internet is designed to be used by everyone. The technology doesn't change us as persons in the first place, the way we are defines how we use technologies. I believe these new technologies and services will simply keep evolving and it is our choices of which ones we use and how we use them that will shape the future of the Internet. So it is a collective choice. And I make similar choices as you do at the moment, but it may change in the future. So what I want from new services is that they give me choices of how I want to use them. They are the ones that will get my vote.

Cheers, Silvia

Re: "As one of the "older" individuals in my workplace, I often find that most individuals are often trying to find ways to avoid social interaction, even with our customers!"

Philbro40, I'm very concerned about, and interested in, what all of this social media is doing to our ability to communicate face-to-face. I see evidence already that it's having an impact -- I see it in my own workplace -- and I think it can only get worse with future generations. Already it's unheard of for a lot of teens to not only communicate face-to-face... but even a phone call is too much to ask. I'm really interested in the behavioral aspect of all of this.

Good points TechnoBabbler and Terry. I'm hesitant about all of this because the more we give, the more we blur the lines, the more we allow overlap in our online personas, the shorter the leash is getting. This public lifestyle we're all living on the Web is vastly different than anything we've tried or witnessed before, and I just think we're often a little too eager to get on board with the newest thing without realizing the repercussions. It's good to be a little skeptical, even if it means the cool kids in the blogosphere will think you a Luddite. So be it!

BTW, TechnoBabbler, I find "leave the gun, take the cannoli" also often applies.